


heart of darkness

by hellokatzchen (Bether)



Category: Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Canon Related, Comment Fic, Dark, Deathfic, Gen, Not Beta Read, One Shot, POV Female Character, POV Third Person, Present Tense, Unhappy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-06-02
Updated: 2011-06-02
Packaged: 2017-10-20 00:50:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 696
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/207051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bether/pseuds/hellokatzchen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU || Bonnie never wanted any of this. She just wanted to protect Mystic Falls. She just wanted to get rid of the darkness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	heart of darkness

**Author's Note:**

> Semi-AU in that it includes some of the finale stuff but Stefan's still around. Written for the prompt "Elena and Bonnie; _you were always my favorite_ " in the [TVD Comment Fest](http://onelastfic.livejournal.com/6074.html) on lj.
> 
>  **Disclaimer:** Characters mentioned are used without permission and are trademarks of the CW/L.J. Smith. I do not own them and am simply borrowing for my purposes. Please don't sue.

It starts with a seed. The smallest seed.

It's buried down deep—so deep she thinks she might be safe. That _they_ might be safe.

They aren't.

The seed grows and grows. She doesn't want it to. She tries to stop it. It's just—

It's just that there's so much anger. So much anger boiling inside of her.

She can't help it. She can't _stop_ it.

Eventually she doesn't want to. Eventually she uses it.

Eventually.

* * *

Damon's first. Of course he is. Was there ever any doubt?

It's just too tempting. Too easy. She has too much power.

And he wants it. God help him, he wants to die. She can see it in his eyes.

So she grants him his wish.

* * *

Tyler's next. She doesn't meant to, exactly. Doesn't want to, anyway.

It's just that he's so out of control. The full moon brings out his darkness and nothing can contain it.

She has to do it. She has to protect the town. It's what Grams would've wanted.

She thinks she sees relief in his eyes as she cuts out his heart.

* * *

Then there's Jeremy. She honestly didn't mean for Jeremy to get caught up in all this. She didn't want that for him; she _never_ wanted that for him.

But she brought him back from the dead. _She_ did that. That's how much she loves him. (Loved him.)

That's part of the darkness, she thinks—the spell that brought him back. She almost wants to believe taking it back will somehow even things out. No more stolen time, no more seeing ghosts, no more.

And then maybe she'll be who she was. _What_ she was.

There's betrayal written all over his face when she takes back the gift of life. He knows for all her rationalizing and excuses, it's a selfish act. (Because she knows that the ghosts told him all her secrets, because no one else can know about the darkness. That would make everything real.)

Still, she pretends the choice is her putting a wrong committed right again. She pretends a lot of things these days.

* * *

When it comes time to deal with Stefan and Caroline, she gets this lump in her throat. She wants to believe it's because the smoke from the fire makes her eyes water, but she knows better.

It's just that the vampires brought the darkness in the first place. _They_ started it.

She's just finishing it. Because it _needs_ to be finished. It's the only way.

There's cowardice in not facing them head on but she's fallen so far, what's a bit more?

* * *

(She doesn't mean for Matt to get caught in the fire, too, but he'd been in the boarding house with the vampires. She feels a pang for it but knows he brought it on himself by allying with them in the first place.)

* * *

The doppelganger is last. Of course she is. It'd been stupid of Bonnie to believe Elena might escape unscathed when she's really the underlying cause of everything.

She fists Elena's long dark hair, pulling her head back to get a good look at her. "You were always my favorite," she murmurs, using the tip of the ceremonial knife to briefly caress her cheek. "I didn't want this for you—I wanted to protect you."

It's just she can't protect the cause of their misfortune. "Now, you'll be protecting all of us."

Tears stream down Elena's cheeks but she can't speak—Bonnie's placed a spell on her to ensure that. (If anyone could talk her out of this, it's her best friend. And she has to do this, she _has_ to.)

"I love you." It's a whisper of a promise she's made hundreds of times before. It's good-bye.

She cuts Elena's throat and bleeds her body dry. She uses the blood to purify the town, to protect Mystic Falls.

And all it took was allowing the darkness inside of her to consume her entire being. The irony does not escape her.

* * *

Two days after Elena's disappearance, Bonnie Bennett is found hanging in her closet. With her the last of the darkness has finally been cleansed.

(There's no one left to appreciate it.)


End file.
